Jun 21 2010

Avoiding the World Cup in Switzerland

by at 2:47 pm

…is difficult to do. For weeks, we have been sealing the windows against buzzing plastic vuvuzelas and honking car processions.  The park behind our building has become a center of World Cup noise—boy, do kids loving blowing on those horns.  It was bad the night Switzerland beat Spain. Also, in our town of Balkan, Portugese, African, Turkish, and other immigrants, any win from Balkan or Portugese-speaking countries elicits rounds of buzzes and honks.  The apartment buildings are decked out in a wide variety of warring flags.  I kind of think spectator sports are generally ridiculous, particularly when they bring out everyone’s nationalist and sexist leanings. And even if I liked soccer and nationalism, we don’t own a TV and I don’t have time to watch. If I make leisure time, it’s going to go towards picking and baking strawberries, not watching men run around on a field in South Africa. I’m trying to finish my master’s thesis and prepare for a conference on the EU, here.

**complain**

Anyway, if you are trying to avoid the World Cup in this fine country, here are some tips?

  1. Don’t live in a town with representatives from many nations.  If you do, head to the most isolated Alpine valley you can for the affected time period.
  2. Keep your windows closed.  You never know when an important team to your neighbors might win.
  3. Don’t take buses.  They have notices that their routes might be disturbed because of the World Cup.  I’m not sure how buses and the Cup are related.
  4. Stay outta the street.  You might get flattened by people more intent on alerting their neighbors to the new World Cup status than on saving gas money.
  5. Don’t talk to anyone other than Americans or students currently taking exams or finishing theses.  Everyone else will launch into a discussion of soccer.

Wait.  I hear buzzing and honking.  What just happened?  The Internet tubes tell me that Portugal just beat Korea.  Are our neighbors cheering for Portugal?  For Brazil beating Côte d’Ivoire?  In preparation for the upcoming match of Switzerland v. Chile?  Oh no, we’re going to Portugal on Wednesday…

One response so far

One Response to “Avoiding the World Cup in Switzerland”

  1. Floraon 09 Aug 2010 at 10:50 pm

    it (now not so secretly) pains me when I visit your blog in hopes of an update and am confronted, once more, with your deep anti-mundial bias. Which I won’t seek to sway (I’ve already been vocal enough on the subject of Uruguay’s National Team and World Cup awesomeness…) so therefore one remedy remains….blog update please?

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